When six boys moved to Indiana we created quite a stir. My oldest brother loved it. So did the corner Custard stand next door to where we were renting while our home was being built. Seems the girls in town were making more visits to get ice cream than in previous years.
I didn't hardly notice at first. I was too busy wrestling and having water fights with my brothers. Then one day a cheerleader in my grade asked why we all had our shirts off when they passed by our living room window a couple days prior. Suddenly it occurred to me that girls like to meet the new guy(s) in town. My older brother noticed this much quicker than I and was already running with every lead including the aforementioned cheerleader.
I had had several crushes through the years but nothing worth noting. Grade school crushes for me were usually just me thinking this girl or that girl was cute and her then not noticing me. Either that or I mistook other giggling girls for making fun of me rather than realizing that they were turning red at how cute they thought my actions were. At any rate, being a new kid in a small town, in middle school, you hear quickly who likes you. The problem is you don't know anyone from anyone else and everyone wants to know who you will choose. Well, I figured dating could wait until I could drive, but I didn't figure those interested when I was twelve would hold my indecision against me when I was sixteen. But I didn't know if I liked these admirers whom I really didn't know back when I was twelve, so I chose no one, or did I?
There was a girl I really liked. I knew her least of all as I didn't have any classes with her that first year. She was a little more discreet about her interest in me but she had a cool sidekick as a friend who was working behind the scenes. She introduced us at the park and encouraged things. Again, I kept thinking what do you do with crushes anyway? Usually the girl you gawk at doesn't show interest back. I remember them standing behind the back stop several times when I was up to bat in my baseball games. That was nice! I struck out a lot with her watching. I remember them inviting me over for flashlight tag on a Sunday and learning how dear to my family religion is as I don't play on the day of rest. Looking back, I only wish I would have at least reciprocated their efforts by taking my turn to invite them to a party I should have thrown for all my new friends, but I was too shy to do it back then. I really did like her but she found herself a boyfriend who could give time to her at an earlier age than I was willing to. Oh well! It was nice to have a crush on someone who felt it back.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Crushes: kindergarten
Kindergarten was a time where all the girls ran away giggling from the one boy who threatened to kiss them, no one exactly sure if they really wanted the chase to end, but they all seemed to love the game. I was too distracted with playing soccer with other boys to care much about the drama. If I had a crush on someone it was the Tom girl who played a mean (as in impressive) game of handball.
I do remember a time where I got caught in the crossfire of the playground games, however. My parents were friends with the parents of one of my schoolmates. She was a nice quiet girl who was often by herself, and though I would never have told her so, I thought she was cute. Since my mom visited her mom with me in tow I got to know her as well as anyone. There family had a trampoline. That was cool.
Well there I was, getting sung the k-i-s-s-i-n-g song as I sat next to this girl. Sure it was embarrassing and we both scrunched our faces in disgust, but it wasn't like I didn't like her. Several days of that and you would think we would have quit sitting next to each other altogether. Instead I found myself standing up for her when I wasn't around her and sitting by her under the monkey bars during recess. She was my first crush but it was more like a friend that was a girl: the first friend I remember having.
My family moved away. The next time I saw this girl we were in college. Let's just say, things were different then.
I do remember a time where I got caught in the crossfire of the playground games, however. My parents were friends with the parents of one of my schoolmates. She was a nice quiet girl who was often by herself, and though I would never have told her so, I thought she was cute. Since my mom visited her mom with me in tow I got to know her as well as anyone. There family had a trampoline. That was cool.
Well there I was, getting sung the k-i-s-s-i-n-g song as I sat next to this girl. Sure it was embarrassing and we both scrunched our faces in disgust, but it wasn't like I didn't like her. Several days of that and you would think we would have quit sitting next to each other altogether. Instead I found myself standing up for her when I wasn't around her and sitting by her under the monkey bars during recess. She was my first crush but it was more like a friend that was a girl: the first friend I remember having.
My family moved away. The next time I saw this girl we were in college. Let's just say, things were different then.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Crushes: crazy crush on me
Though I didn't date much in high school, it was not for lack of interests. I was not interested in dating until I could drive, however, so I could properly pick the girl up and really go out. It was always funny to hear about people "going out" who really weren't going anywhere. There were several girls who either had a crush on me or I on them, but apparently it didn't last long enough for us to come of age to do anything about it. I'll have to write about crushes I have had, but today I write about a girl who had a crush on me.
She was crazy! No really. When a girl brags in the locker room to all the other girls about how she has been with a guy, she smells of cologne splashed all over herself, and she literally has your name tanned across her belly, that is crazy. I've never had the urge to do any of that for a crush. Of course, being my reserved self it was obvious to all my friends that this girl was out of her mind. Word got back to me. Thankfully it was more funny than anything, but I can't say it wasn't a little bit freaky, and I had to wonder if she was harmless. It's funny to look back on now.
She was crazy! No really. When a girl brags in the locker room to all the other girls about how she has been with a guy, she smells of cologne splashed all over herself, and she literally has your name tanned across her belly, that is crazy. I've never had the urge to do any of that for a crush. Of course, being my reserved self it was obvious to all my friends that this girl was out of her mind. Word got back to me. Thankfully it was more funny than anything, but I can't say it wasn't a little bit freaky, and I had to wonder if she was harmless. It's funny to look back on now.
Monday, September 13, 2010
My First Group Date
I never went on a group date in high school, but I should have. It seemed if you asked someone out on a date then you were immediately considered to be in a relationship with them (except for Prom). I don't know if it was a high school thing where you needed to be paired off exclusively if you were going to go on a date, or if that was a small town thing where rumors fly, so it just seemed that way. I wish I would have grabbed a couple friends and told them to get dates for a group thing and then grabbed different dates for the next week. I do remember how I couldn't wait for college and being able to date around a little before settling on one option.
I lived off-campus throughout college so I could room with my older brother. That was cool! As a freshmen I had a few older roommates, but I was game to be included in many things they did, even when they posed the idea of a group date. We had a lot of fun as roommates and on occasion we had invited apartments of girls out for ice cream, so doing a group date together was not that far-fetched.
My roommates actually made it really easy. One of them had gone on a date with a girl who had six roommates. Yeah, that's a lot of girls under one roof. Anyway, he first asked her if she could set up a certain roommate with his direct roommate, and she offered to set up his other roommates too, if he wanted. So my brother and I were given dates too, the only problem is no one ever told my brother and I, or our dates, who was being set up with who. That was an awkward first group date. Firsts for me in dating have often been awkward growing experiences and if I had it all to do over again it would be different. I guess you could say I'm behind the curve of people who started dating in the 1st grade.
I lived off-campus throughout college so I could room with my older brother. That was cool! As a freshmen I had a few older roommates, but I was game to be included in many things they did, even when they posed the idea of a group date. We had a lot of fun as roommates and on occasion we had invited apartments of girls out for ice cream, so doing a group date together was not that far-fetched.
My roommates actually made it really easy. One of them had gone on a date with a girl who had six roommates. Yeah, that's a lot of girls under one roof. Anyway, he first asked her if she could set up a certain roommate with his direct roommate, and she offered to set up his other roommates too, if he wanted. So my brother and I were given dates too, the only problem is no one ever told my brother and I, or our dates, who was being set up with who. That was an awkward first group date. Firsts for me in dating have often been awkward growing experiences and if I had it all to do over again it would be different. I guess you could say I'm behind the curve of people who started dating in the 1st grade.
Monday, August 30, 2010
My Prom Date
The Geo Metro didn't make an appearance for this important evening. My cousin's Isuzu Rodeo did. Hey, I thought it was a great ride. Who knew that everyone else in a small farm town had connections to someone with a luxury car. Maybe the reason for a Junior Prom is to give you practice so you can get everything right for Senior Prom. My prom date, for instance, was looking forward to when it was her turn to buy a dress that fit her better, since she was wearing her older sister's from a previous year.
A formal evening together was a little awkward at first, but moving from one thing to the next helped with conversation. My youngest brother (about age 7) made the funniest, most memorable, and probably the best compliment of the evening. The first thing he shouted out loud and clear to my date when we walked into my home was "you sure have nice teeth." She did have a nice smile--very photogenic. It was funny to hear her laugh as she politely thanked him.
It was actually fun to dress up for something, to look nice, and to act the part. I felt like a real gentleman opening her door, helping her with her coat, and into her seat at the table, dancing, and genuinely trying to be polite all around. But I'm sure both of our lack of dating experience showed, in fact I remember laughing about that very thing. After prom was a little more relaxing and the high school put on a good party for it. The best thing about my date is the values we shared. We both respected each other. We had a mutual trust that allowed us to be more comfortable than others were that night. We knew that neither of us would act out of character. Getting drunk and sleeping around wasn't in our nature normally, so prom would be no exception, and we didn't have to worry about ruining our friendship.
When I couldn't readily find a date of my choosing, I declined the expense of going with the same girl to Senior Prom when she asked me over the phone the next year, but I was glad I had gone with her to Junior Prom and had an enjoyable experience overall.
A formal evening together was a little awkward at first, but moving from one thing to the next helped with conversation. My youngest brother (about age 7) made the funniest, most memorable, and probably the best compliment of the evening. The first thing he shouted out loud and clear to my date when we walked into my home was "you sure have nice teeth." She did have a nice smile--very photogenic. It was funny to hear her laugh as she politely thanked him.
It was actually fun to dress up for something, to look nice, and to act the part. I felt like a real gentleman opening her door, helping her with her coat, and into her seat at the table, dancing, and genuinely trying to be polite all around. But I'm sure both of our lack of dating experience showed, in fact I remember laughing about that very thing. After prom was a little more relaxing and the high school put on a good party for it. The best thing about my date is the values we shared. We both respected each other. We had a mutual trust that allowed us to be more comfortable than others were that night. We knew that neither of us would act out of character. Getting drunk and sleeping around wasn't in our nature normally, so prom would be no exception, and we didn't have to worry about ruining our friendship.
When I couldn't readily find a date of my choosing, I declined the expense of going with the same girl to Senior Prom when she asked me over the phone the next year, but I was glad I had gone with her to Junior Prom and had an enjoyable experience overall.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
My First Date: getting after prom tee-shirts
The nicest girl, with the nicest smile asked me out for Junior Prom. I know, I know, and if you knew how many hints she had dropped, you especially might think it should have been me asking her out. Forget how much I liked her friend, the bait, who waited until the last moment to reveal her newly acquired boyfriend and would-be prom date.
More than me being shy about asking a girl out, the reality is that I thought I needed to like a girl in a certain way, and know that the girl liked me in that same way, before I would ask her out. This wasn't a pre-requisite, however, taken by my prom date. Maybe she thought my advances toward her friend really were for her.
At any rate, she jokingly asked me out in the lunch line with a bunch of mutual friends around us, which took me by surprise. I didn't really know if she was being serious. She gave a hypothetical that if neither of us had dates for prom we should just go together. I sloughed it off at first, telling her something about how I was going to start looking for a date for Senior Prom. I embarrassingly, have to admit, that it took her twin brother telling me that she was serious, for me to realize how I might be really hurting someone. I walked up behind her at her locker at the soonest opportunity and whispered, "I guess I need to find out where you live, so I can take you to prom," which elicited a big yell of excitement and a hug.
Maybe my first date ever was meant to be with just a friend. I was comfortable enough, after all. I was ready to have a fun time. She, on the other hand, was a little more nervous trying to make a good impression, and not her typical chatty self. We were just getting after prom tee-shirts on this day, so that was going to be easy enough.
The two main things I remember from the date:
1) The key to the geo metro I was driving was broken off in the ignition. My family always stuck the half key in to start the car so know one would suspect anything, but a screwdriver could have worked just as well. When we went over railroad tracks the key popped out next to her feet. She screamed. And I calmly asked her if she could give me my keys back, though as long as I didn't stall the car it was running just fine. We had a good laugh over that and my family's secret was out.
2) Guys can't shop in the girls section for tee-shirts but girls can wear guys tee-shirts so we saw a lot of shirts that I liked, but none she was too crazy about. She is a really caring girl because she saw how much I liked a particular soccer shirt and then insisted that we get those shirts.
Looking back, I wish I would have insisted that we spend more time finding a shirt she would also want to wear in the future.
More than me being shy about asking a girl out, the reality is that I thought I needed to like a girl in a certain way, and know that the girl liked me in that same way, before I would ask her out. This wasn't a pre-requisite, however, taken by my prom date. Maybe she thought my advances toward her friend really were for her.
At any rate, she jokingly asked me out in the lunch line with a bunch of mutual friends around us, which took me by surprise. I didn't really know if she was being serious. She gave a hypothetical that if neither of us had dates for prom we should just go together. I sloughed it off at first, telling her something about how I was going to start looking for a date for Senior Prom. I embarrassingly, have to admit, that it took her twin brother telling me that she was serious, for me to realize how I might be really hurting someone. I walked up behind her at her locker at the soonest opportunity and whispered, "I guess I need to find out where you live, so I can take you to prom," which elicited a big yell of excitement and a hug.
Maybe my first date ever was meant to be with just a friend. I was comfortable enough, after all. I was ready to have a fun time. She, on the other hand, was a little more nervous trying to make a good impression, and not her typical chatty self. We were just getting after prom tee-shirts on this day, so that was going to be easy enough.
The two main things I remember from the date:
1) The key to the geo metro I was driving was broken off in the ignition. My family always stuck the half key in to start the car so know one would suspect anything, but a screwdriver could have worked just as well. When we went over railroad tracks the key popped out next to her feet. She screamed. And I calmly asked her if she could give me my keys back, though as long as I didn't stall the car it was running just fine. We had a good laugh over that and my family's secret was out.
2) Guys can't shop in the girls section for tee-shirts but girls can wear guys tee-shirts so we saw a lot of shirts that I liked, but none she was too crazy about. She is a really caring girl because she saw how much I liked a particular soccer shirt and then insisted that we get those shirts.
Looking back, I wish I would have insisted that we spend more time finding a shirt she would also want to wear in the future.
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